What you are feeling is the grieving process and you should never deny yourself any part of the process. It seems that you take a step forward but then two steps backwards. The sort of age that might be expected to be lonely. Today. You will never leave my heart and my love for you will never fade. You are undoubtedly a very resilient and courageous individual. She lived in another county a few hundred miles away, and while she still knew and appreciated her familiar home and connections it seemed cruel and counterproductive to move her. I too am crying, because so many of these are how I feel. Today is Jason’s birthday. Weâd climbed echelons together and had our days in the limelight but ultimately had each seen much disappointment and betrayal when weâd hoped, and invested time in others and the wider world. I was totally unprepared for his death. The words of Keanu Reeves have helped me many times when I feel overwhelmed: “Grief changes shape, but it never ends. © 2020 Whats your Grief. Yep, its tough, but I’ve found it makes me more determined to succeed and the bonus is the distraction which gives me a little bit of relief from the absolute grief in my heart every day. I lost my mom 7 years ago.. guilt for everytime we argued and being selfish too.. guilt for not knowing how much she really loved me more than herself. He came into my life 4 years after I separated from and divorced my husband of 32 years. You realize a whole lot its almost hard to argue with you (not that I actually will need to?HaHa). I wrote this family book in hopes to ease this painful fear. I didn’t even get to tell him i love him. Good Friday is here. He was so uncomplaining, taking only paracetamol and getting up and getting dressed until his last few days. I lost my father 3 weeks ago and I’m just starting to understand my grief and where it will take me…, Cate M August 12, 2016 at 11:30 pm Reply. Her last phone message to me was horrible, and unbelievable. Lots of prayers-she made it one year and the worst year I have ever seen anyone go through chemo. I had found a beautiful song I’d never heard before about Jesus dying. Dunno what hit me or “triggered” my subconscious to actually type in this lo-o-ng search words/line on google: “quotes of feelings on losing someone special”…blah! I am terribly sorry! I insisted they never said that directly to her but we reassured her that although it was unlikely she was going to die any time soon, I would be with her and it would be fine when that distant day came. At one point they said things had stopped growing so instead of waiting- they tell her its best to go on very strong caustic chemo to make sure it stays gone. I have a hole in my soul over the loss of my mom, but I want her memory to be actively moving me toward filling holes that I can fill. Reading the quotes passes a little time that I find myself just trying to “get thru”. I hear people mourn their one grief, or two, or three, but everybody seems to still have somebody, and somebodyâs everything. We live life as if death will never come near us, the only sure thing to come in life. I just need to get month old thank you cards finished to our overwhelmingly loving community. I am devastated and still in shock by the fact she had stage 4 cancer let alone her death today after only 6 days. Carolyn September 26, 2019 at 3:56 pm Reply. I just read your comment in reply to another in reguard’s to grief. I lost my husband if 36 years on 7/22/17. It feels like I will never know happiness again. After graduation I have to make my appt with the crematorium to sort out my mom’s cremation. I lost my mum last month and i’m thankful I was by her side until the end. I can’t believe she’s gone. Just the thought of having to face another day and try to continue to work so I can have a roof over my head fills me with fear and dread. It is an emotional, physical and spiritual necessity, the price you pay for love. We only found out she had cancer 6 days ago. We used to watch the news together and know that on any new issue that weâd never discussed before, our shared sense of justice and logic and taking the longer view would mean that weâd both formed the same opinion on it. Keep your head up sweetie. You’re in my prayers. XoXo Rest easy my love, an I know one day we’ll be in each other’s arms again, see you on the other side.. Shari November 11, 2019 at 12:56 am Reply. Nights and mornings are unbearable. How will I go on? John Holland January 7, 2020 at 5:12 am Reply. I know I will be with my lost loves one day and if they actually do see me grieving why can’t I feel them? He was only two at the time his papaw passed away. Iâm only just turned 60. My mom was my best friend and I was her carer so most days were spent with my mom whether working for her or hanging out with her. There are 312 grief-related words in total, with the top 5 most semantically related being sorrow, anxiety, heartache, sadness and pain.You can get the definition(s) of a word in the list below by … We had a great time! I have no mother, father, sister, brother (I never had), child (I never had), husband or partner. The way his eyes looked into mine I feel like such a letdown to him because he had always been able to count on me before. We met 8 years later. It was a happy comfort to me to be in the company of the only other soul who remembered and cared. He had a friend go in with him because he had a bad feeling when the phone AND knocking on the door brought no results. Now he was gone. They said he could have been there as long as 24 hours. We had one son & it has been one year now & it is so hard. I walked the country fields and city streets endlessly, talking to her spirit. I go and hide to cry. She looked so peaceful as she must have known it was finally going to be done. The next day he was found dead by his best friend, who was also his landlord. Thank you for sharing your story. This is beyond horrific that he should die such a horrific death, ALONE. I had never known sadness like this. Want so much to dream with them but can’t seem to or don’t remember if I did. Dr. Alan D. Wolfelt is a noted author, educator, and grief counselor. ? You are strong enough to get through this. I have found that no one can understand your grief like someone else who has been through it. Dear Susan- I cannot begin to comprehend how you feel. After I was adopted she stopped visiting,writing, or keeping any contact at all. This coincided with my mam being in her first respite care and, in my view, neglect (theyâd ignored my precise written health care and medication instructions ) leading to dehydration, kidney infection, pneumonia and hospital admission. Im sure she misses you and regrets everything that led to you being taken from her. I’m so sorry. He was 78 and we didn’t expect that he would die. Thank you for these quotes and sayings, I found it while looking for something to send to my sister in her mourning. We were in an airport in Mexico ready to board our plane home when he said he felt dizzy and was going to faint. The next day he was found dead by his best friend, who was also his landlord. Actions Speak Louder Than Words. Grieving becomes a part of us. I can’t accomplish anything it seems. When a family loses a loved one, it is as if they have lost one of their limbs. But my heart is so torn apart I feel like its giving up .. but I have 5 children whom depend on me yet I feel so worthless for them like I’m bringing them all down because I cant stay strong for them .. lord help me I’m dying with all this heart ache.. thank you all for sharing for this is the first time I am sharing my thoughts,feelings.. i need healing fast before i leave my babies worse than i am, Louise snippert January 8, 2019 at 10:04 am Reply. Lost my soul mate to a sudden death age 35 – miss him beyond words I wouldn’t wish this type of pain on anyone I feel broken in two. This family use to be very close, but I am afraid they will never be the same. GeneviÃ¨ve, Laraine September 14, 2017 at 2:05 am Reply, Hello Lisa, I am so sorry for your loss and my heart truly breaks for you. All rights reserved. It was wonderful to read all the above from all the other lost and lonely souls to understand that much of what I feel has been felt by many a good soul since time began. I feel your loss. With my girls came drugs as I couldn’t cope with losing a son & drugs numbed my terror of something happening to another child of mine. No, no; âtis all menâs office to speak patience 30 To those that wring under the load of sorrow, But no manâs virtue nor sufficiency To be so moral when he shall endure The like himself. People have a misconception that … Everyone loves Jason and Freddy. He is gone. I couldn’t believe how good it felt to truly laugh with someone other than my friends, children and grandchildren. You would think I would be better equipped with coping, but not so. PLEASE LET ME KNOW THAT YOU ARE OKAY, AND ARE THINKING ABOUT ME TOO!! DM REYN0 November 9, 2018 at 3:28 pm Reply. 1 week before she passed. To be known. We were often thinking about the same things. Take 10 mins, quiet your mind and listen to your own body answer these questions. she left at the worst time as I had lost my dad. Can’t say anymore now because I can’t see the keyboard from crying .I love,love love you. The firefighters found her right inside the front door when they broke in the door. I am so sorry for your loss, your post actually made me cry more than these quotes did, I hope you could open your heart to the man you referred to in your post. And don’t forget to keep checking up on the person, weeks and even months after the loss. I havenât seen you for five years and Iâm almost 15 now. Jeanne Frye September 30, 2016 at 3:05 pm Reply, I am just a mom, just a mom who lost her son almost two years ago. We were best friends and I was her carer so she has been a major part of my daily life. I said I was leaving school soon and we would see her at the hospital. Her struggle was unnoticed as she spiraled down and tragically died, still a great beauty aged 45. I lost my Husband on Feb. 14 suddenly to a heart attack, he was 64. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer on 3/1/18 and passed away 6/7/18. One of my best friends died Monday night (July 31, 2018). On arrival at the hospital I explained she needed rehydration and antibiotics and bowel evacuation and whilst they took an age to get it done it was like watering a plant. I feel the same. Don’t give up. But one does not replace another. My father drank himself to death – and my husband is fighting every day to stay here…. Then I realize that I am just thinking crazy and I fall apart all over again. I miss him terribly. Hold it close, Hold it Dear. I know your grief still continues. I was a kid-stuck in a private room alone with the owner crying his eyes out being told I would still be part of the family and they would help me when I needed. People have a misconception that you can deal with it and say, âItâs gone, and Iâm betterâ. My grown son died 3 months ago, he would be 43 today. I am so lost and want to be where he is. Now that they are in school all day- I started from scratch and went back to school to get my pre-reqs. visit him at Ryan P Frye Virtual Memorial, sandi December 2, 2016 at 3:26 am Reply. Before I was able to live and work and survive but now I feel alone without strength. Sadly,he was an alcoholic. I got married (lost what widows benefits I had-and now have a permanent injunction that he is not allowed near me, obviously still not in my right mind) I was diagnosed with a muscle disease and was told I would be lucky to make it to 40. Don't feel pressure to hide what you are feeling. Each day I live is one day closer to him. Pat Brennan June 17, 2018 at 11:31 am Reply. and everytime i close my eyes i see him walking up to me and hugging me like he used to do and there are times that it gets so hard to live without him and i just lock myself in my room because i miss him so much. peachey January 4, 2020 at 10:53 am Reply. Even with all that in the final 24 hours she still showed signs of discomfort & it was so hard to witness. Georgia Geisler October 21, 2017 at 9:40 pm Reply. Knowing he is not suffering helps me get through the day. He was just 30 years old. I think it’s a shame to leave a dying mother at 90 years old to a brother who has a knee that was just prepared 8 months ago or a injured back from lifing his mother up none of the other family members would not let her go into nursing home shame on them all may God have mercy on them for neglected there brother.